A few days ago, I decided that if my book proposal does not get accepted by Trafalgar Press, that I was going to give up writing. Yes, I said, I AM tired of head banging. And yes, I did see it as a truism; I have worked very hard at my writing for many years – and therefore, my lack of success can easily be attributed to the fact that I just am not that good at it. I also thought, well, I do have a few good years left, and perhaps can make the world a better place in a different kind of way.

I sort of mentioned this to Pete who has heard the above so often that he has turned a deaf ear to what I have to say. This time, his response was much the same. He simply said that the proposal is good and that it will get accepted. He said this with considerable

conviction, enough to make me waver about my decision.

Old, timeworn habits are difficult if not impossible to break. I realized this, this morning when I was on my to Wilderness Responder class. Ideas do energize, and it is hard for me to not act upon them. The cartoon (which accompanies this dispatch) was the first idea. What came to mind was an image of a fellow in one of my classes, who with coffee in hand, begins to pontificate. And, no one listens.

It’s true. I actually like it when other people imbibe because then they are talkative and in good moods. It is also kind of sad because their ideas are coffee driven, and, therefore, usually nothing comes of these plans.

My next thought came to me as I realized that I now have some peripheral vision. It was that I should write an article, maybe for the Centered Riding Newsletter, maybe for another, related publication, on Being a Centered Wilderness First Responder. I’d use the four basics, breathing, soft eyes, alignment, and centering included.

Then, I thought, maybe I should suggest to the instructor that she give out an assignment on the mind/body relationship. Dorothy actually liked the idea, which surprised me – so I am going to write it up for her to think about. This was my writing across the curriculum training coming into play.

We got out of class early. The sun was shining brightly. I considered taking a nap because getting up so early left me feeling fatigued. I didn’t know exactly what I was going to do with the horses. It was actually a day in which the ideas surfaced slowly –there was nothing earth shattering about my proposed plan. I first drove Hrimmi around the loop and then down the trail road. She sped up and I fell into the snow at the side of the trail. I called her name and she came trotting back to me. Then I drove Tyra around the loop and down to the Murphy Road Turnaround. She’s had limited driving experience, but thankfully she was up for this. Then, lastly, I rode Raudi around the loop and ponied Tinni. It all went really well – the horses were enthused, engaged, and eager to be out and about. It would have been really easy to instead go skiing. That I worked with them and they were so responsive left me with a very satisfying feeling.

So, ideas continue to surface. What to do? I’m not sure. I’m never sure.

Next: 55. 2/24/19: Another Conversation with my Subconscious